So I have 2 upcoming exams, one called card signing (CS) on Friday and a semester quiz on Tuesday. I'm not freaking out that badly. Well, I never did. But I know I have to be studying all for these. Plus the amount of things I have to study it's horrible.
I guess it's when to these kind of situations, I get so upset and depressed. I miss my sisters a lot. I remember the times we all just studied together for certain tests or exams. The times we totally conquered the whole dining room area just to ourselves. How we put stupid animals into the door hole and paste up signs of "Do not disturb or ___ (the animal) will be angry." And how we are constantly hungry in the midst of study and hunting food together. The times where we are only 2 stories apart, we still have to skype each other. I miss these times.
Right now, I'm here, stuck, alone and sad. Only they can tolerate my stupidness. Only they are able to answer my stupid questions and make sure I really understand it. Only they are the ones that actually are willing to spend the time and effort to slowly explain it to me, no matter how simple the question was. Only they are the ones that will say "Go have your 5 mins nap, I'll wake you up after." or shouting at me "Stop sleeping daffy! Get up and study now!" They are the only ones I listen to.
I'm afraid I won't do well. Or at least to what I am capable of. :( All the best to me. I'm always completely lost in lectures, and I'm probably too afraid to ask people the simplest questions ever. They all judge. They all think I'm dumb. I'm like the shadows of everyone here, in terms of everything. Brain wise and financial wise. They won't understand why I'm constantly so cheapskate, but my sisters do. In fact, they will join along to. In a whole group of people, I'll just space out, hoping to find someone's eyes and having the same kind of understanding that I have with my sisters and the non-communication talks going "What the heck are they talking about?!". It feels quite tiring to be hopping from one shadow to another..
I miss you two very much. ♥ Homesickness or sistersickness?
No comments:
Post a Comment